Scared!

Hi Guys

Well I've been going really well this week, eating well, sticking to points.
Work is Great! I found out on Thurs that I'd be going back to Marketing on 8th of Dec, then on Friday my boss asked me if I would stay on til May with them in this role!!! I spoke to Shaun and we are willing to stay til March no later, and work is ok with that! It has to be confirmed by HR but I should be staying in this Consultant role til 27th Feb!! WOO HOO. so instead of coming home in 12 weeks it is 16 weeks now! But still under 20 weeks!!

Any who, on Sat morning (without going into too much detail) I woke up to losing a lot of blood. I've had my monthly issues since the 30th of Oct and Sat it seemed to accelerate! I was so scared and worried. Shaun had no idea how to deal with it, it was everywhere. And I've been heavy before I always am, but this was different this was wrong!! All i can say is it looked like a horror movie!

SO with Shaun dealing with it by mowing the lawns, I took myself down to emergency. Probably good thing he wasn't there, he would have been panicing! I had an exam, and the dr. had to feel my tum tum for any abnormalities. I did a pregnancy test, NOT positive thankgod! (I can't afford that right now) The Dr. then said he wants me to have an ultrasound as he's worried there may be a mass there causing severe bleeding. So he put me on some hormone tablets to stop the bleeding and I will speak to the hospital tomorrow when they call for an appt for the ultrasound. I did some research and I think the mass he is refering to is Fibroids, they are a type of tumor that grows either on the outside of the womb, the inside, on stalks or in the cervix. They can be treated with hormone therapy or depending on size and location surgery.
I'm praying it will only require Hormone Therapy. He did say that what he thinks it is can be treated with these and that's why he gave them to me now, to jump start. Hopefully he's right!

I've been a bit off today, feeling quite down. A bit scared I think. My number one thing right now is knowing I can still have children! So I'm praying to some higher being that i can still get pregnant!

Anyway, I'll let you know how I go!

Chat soon.

K xo

Lazy

Hey guys

Well I am weighing in tonight. Nicola from work and I are doing it together now to give us both a push in the right direction. I'm praying that this will not only help Nicola but having someone else go with me each week keep me on the straight and narrow.

I don't know what to say or how to explain what has happened this year, I was doing so well I'd lost 15kg's and now I'm looking at the fact that I've gained more than half of it back. I guess what they say is true, it just sneaks back on!

One thing I do know is I'm proud of the fact that I have NOT given up. That says something, that says I want this to happen it's just making it happen. Those tablets don't seem to do too much actually if anything i think that they suppress my appetite but they don't assist in losing weight that's for sure. lol

SO tonight i'll weigh in, I'm not going to write how much i gain, and I'm not going to write tonight. I'm going to simply move on and deal with the next week since It is going to be hard, I've let myself slip into bad habits again and I don't like it. I have noticed that I even feel yukky after falling off the wagon now, I was so full of energy before. So it's time to take back control and just do it!

I will get up 3 mornings a week to start with and do 30 min cardio workouts since i know dam well i won't do it when I get home!

So onto the next week and to lose some much needed fluid and weight!

Don't wish me luck, I don't think I'll need it! I'm going to do this.. I am in control not my cravings. MIND OVER MATTER, isn't that what they say? This is my time!

K xo